By Stephen Guy Hardin
It must be rough on the psyche being forced to realize that the illusion of greatness that has been your life is just a product of a dysfunctional upbringing that shaped your personality into a delusional pretzel. It would depress me too, but then again, I don’t see myself as God with a capital ‘G.’ It’s been quite a fall from the heights of Mount Parnassus after giving the nod to Navy Seal’s to whack Bin Laden to watching the mainstream media salivate at the Solyndra scandal like Oprah running to an all you can eat buffet. Never mind the endless torrent of unemployment news, the stagnant economy, a disillusioned liberal base and a surgeon right leaning populist wave times are tough at Biden’s bungalow by the bay. So it really comes as no surprise when that bastion of progressive objectiveness, The New York Times, is leaking it’s soon to be breaking rumor that President Biden is suffering from exhaustion due to what the official White House doctor terms puppet fatigue. Perhaps this rumor isn’t as contrived as one might imagine considering his recent reelection campaign appearance at North Carolina State University. Screaming to a fired-up crowd of students in the smallest auditorium at North Carolina State the president beseeched, “If you love me, you’ve got to help get reelected! I need your support! I need your love! I especially need your money and your parents’ money! Please!” Yikes! Somebody needs some love. Perhaps the country would be served if Dr. Jill spent more time in the Lincoln Bedroom and less time at Me So Pretty Nail Salon. But I digress. Mr. Biden, speaking to a crowd of more than 9,000 teens in a un-air conditioned auditorium, regurgitated the tired talking points of his reelection campaign, and urged students to help him protect democracy. Speaking down to his audience in his most professorial tone, Mr. Biden called on the assembled students to view their support for his program as a “homework assignment.” “For those of you who did skip class today, I’ve got a homework assignment for you,” he said, “tell your parents that the time for investing in their 401K or municipal bonds is over. Your parents’ money is your money, and your money is my money. Claim your inheritance now so I can reclaim it from you! You don’t deserve it, but I do! The time for action is now. We will take checks, money orders and all major credit cards, except Discover.” The president touted a series of second-rate, shop-worn proposals that he said would help America “get back to a place where we’re creating good, middle-class jobs again.” “Jobs that pay well! “Jobs that offer some security!” “Jobs that will allow you to donate money to my campaign.” “Get me reelected and I guarantee that right here in North Carolina about 19,000 union construction workers will have a job again. Reelect me and I will add more jobs for your right here in the Tar Heel state. More jobs for North Carolina union teachers, union cops and union firefighters, as well as union dish washers, union landscapers, union garbage haulers, union truckers, union transgender clinics and union non-binary sex workers.” Union non-binary sex workers indeed. “You know what’s right. We know what we’ve got to do to create jobs right now,” he continued, to enthusiastic applause. “We’ve got to give workers new skills for new jobs… We’ve got to give our young people a chance to earn a college education. We need to build an economy that lasts.” “I love you Barack!” one voice cried out in the crowd. “I mean Uncle Joe!” “I love Barack too,” the president replied. “But if you love me, you’ve got to help me get reelected! Getting me reelected is the same as re-electing Barack Obama for his fourth term!” In the less than classic 1981 Mel Brooks comedy, History of the World Part I, Brooks played France’s King Louis XVI on the eve of the French Revolution. Brooks’ King Louis was constantly proclaiming that “It’s good to be king.” Within the context of the movie, it was spoken as the ultimate statement of contempt for the common folk and the ultimate statement of the self-entitlement of the aristocracy. Hmmm… sounds familiar. As Brooks’ King Louis enjoyed the use of the innocuous garcon de pisse (a.k.a. “piss-boy”) to relieve himself whenever and wherever he felt the royal urge, so President Obama … I mean President Biden, uses the innocuous muddle-headed youth of public universities to bask in the former glory that was 2008. But just as mockingly exposed as King Louis with his fly opened Mr. Biden reveals himself to be as petulant, vain glorious, confused, corrupt and exposed as the soon to be deposed King of France. Maybe it’s not good to be king, after all. Just ask Barack Obama… I mean President Joe Biden. I guess Mel Brooks was wrong.
Hardin Republic 